Forecast: 100% Chance of Rain

I have cried every day since I've been pregnant.

This may be a slight exaggeration... but I don't know! I thought about this yesterday and sat for a while, trying to remember the last day I didn't cry. Pointless - I went back more than 2 months and then gave up. The only thing I can figure is there may have been a few days in my first trimester when I was just too tired to cry. When you sleep every moment you're not working, you don't have time to cry.

It's not like a huge, emotional event. It doesn't usually last long or get overly dramatic. It just seems to be a daily guarantee that something will build up inside of me and then it will pour. This is not "me." I used stick to the following things pretty well:

• extreme pain
• extreme frustration (i.e. - I cry when I fight)
• hearing "When I get where I'm going" on the radio or being forced to watch "A Beautiful Mind" - these 2 things have eerie reminders of my papaw within them, and it always gets me.

These days there is no telling what will set it off. It is driving me crazy. Today I asked Darin if he was getting tired of it yet. "Don't you ever just want to walk away when you see it coming?" He said no, of course... he's not stupid. But seriously. The poor boy.

Today it was the comments at church. One woman actually asked me how on earth I was going to get any bigger with 2 months left. Really?

Yesterday it was the unending To-Do list. I have got to get rid of a few things or I am going to lose my mind. I had a little hospital scare this week (nothing to worry about!)... but I think it sent me into some sort of reality check about this baby coming. I had set in my mind that we still have 2 months, but Madelyn could come whenever she pleases (or God pleases, really)! Wow.

Tomorrow it will be... NO. Tomorrow I will break the cycle. Or at least that's my goal. We'll see how that turns out!